SWJS

No I'm around. Have a reason to be here again too. Will start up PoF again eventually... That's all. No seriously, you're still here? It's been like two years, I'm too lazy to explain what all happened then. <_<

So it's been a week since I got Mass Effect 3. I have to admit it's quite a game. Surprisingly I'm still not finished, considering the DLC I just bought and the many endings it has. I also have yet to play through the game as a renegade, though it's insidiously difficult to do. It's hard to be a jerkass to all the friends and colleagues I've spent the past two games getting to know and growing to love.

After a couple more playthroughs, I should have enough material to write an accurate review with. After I post the review the most I'll be doing with ME3 is achievement hunting and multiplayer. Touch and go stuff.

As for non-ME3 related stuff, my stories have obviously been on hold for the past week. On the positive side, I could definately learn a few tips from ME3's eight writers. And if I didn't say I had, I'd be lying. Thanks to ME's diverse and rich backstory I believe I can gain some inspiration from the game and thus use that to improve my own works. Needless to say I've got some ideas buzzing about in my head.

I'm also waiting for Saints Row The Third, which I lended out some time ago, to be returned to me this saturday. I'm also looking to get the mission pack DLC being released this spring for it as well, though I'm short by 10 MS points.

Really that's all that's been happening for now, so I'll see you guys again when I post the ME3 review.

But before I go I will say one thing. If you haven't ever played Mass Effect, don't intend to, or don't have ME3 yet: SHAME ON YOU.

Remember how I said I'd post more frequently? Well I haven't.

Anyway, I've been doing lots of thinking. LOTS of thinking. And I thought it would be great if I put my writing talents to use and turned these dusty old journals into a weekly/monthly/when-I-get-to-it blog, talking about different subjects. Mostly my opinions on a certain viewpoint or subject, but it'll mostly be video-game related.

Each of these blogs will have a title category and a subject. So for example, here are some examples:

"Gaming - Mass Effect 3 Review"

"Gaming - Graphics"

"Movies - Plot"

"Movies - Spaceballs Review"

"Personal - Vent Journal (1)"

"Personal - Current Events"

And so on. This new "blog" format and schedule will give me a way to speak my mind, write new material, and update more regularly. So you get to read more of my incomprehensible babbling! Yay!

Yeah, dA isn't the best place for this type of thing, but I figured "Eh, why the hell not?" You never know until you try, like sex. Or new foods... Or sex. Point is... I forgot what my point is. But you people are smart enough to figure it out right?

Anyway, my first blog will likely be posted in the next week or so. I get Mass Effect 3 today, and I'lll most likely have a metric shit ton to talk/complain about, so you can probably look forward to my (hopefully) well-thought-out and (possibly hopefully) humorous review of the game.

So with this announcement out of the way, I'm off to bed. Today may as well be a holiday to hardcore gamers, for ME3 is finally upon us! Also Assassin's Creed 3 was announced. More on that when I give a shit. :3

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This announcement will now self destruct. Please bend over, put your head between your knees, and kiss your ass goodbye. Have a pleasant day, SWJS hopes you enjoyed his subliminal messaging.

Hoorah for random gibberish... Yeah work with me people it's almost 10:00 am here. Why am I up this early? I never went to bed. Yes yes yes, "it's bad for your health, blah blah blabity blah." I can't help it if my sleep is fucked up. Well I can, but that's not the point. The point is.. I don't know. So don't question my logic... Neah.

Anyway, as per my promise in my last journal, which if you haven't read by now you are a horrible person who has no feelings, this is a journal update as part of an attempt to remain active. Back on the actual point at hand, that doesn't involve sarcastic assholism, over the night I watched the That Guy With The Glasses Year Three Anniversary Special: Suburban Knights. Why is this important? Well I'm a fan of their work, mostly The Nostalgia Critic though. Anyway, it was probably one of the most enjoyable things I've ever watched. It was funny, epic, and touching at some times as well. The point is I enjoyed it. Hell, for a bunch of thirty-somethings with a video camera, low-tech effects, and a 4-day or so shooting scheduale, it turned out fairly decent.

Anyway, it has given me inspiration, and motivation! I want to write something funny, yet epic, and maybe heart-touching at the same time. What will I write? I have no idea, but you guys can make suggestions. I already have an idea. Which I will discuss with Nukawin on MSN later. Possibly. If I can pull another "stay up all day" schtick. I probably wont start it until I post PoF Chapter 2, which I'm too tired to even try and work on right now, but be on the lookout for that in the next month or so.

Anyway, I'm staying up all day to fix my sleep, so don't expect much out of me as I'll be running on empty. It's better than sleeping until 9:30pm. Yeah. But, I've got a bit of inspiration and motivation. Once I work out a good plot I'll see about starting on this new project, which I am titling... Project... "Write an epic funny sappy story thing!" ...YOU come up with something better. Go on I dare you. <_< Yeeeaaahh. So yeah.

Haveanicedayeverybody. *runs out and slams door*

*pokes head in* Psst, P.S. Nukawin Happy Belated Birthday! I was planning on posting a special birthday comment on your profile, and I'm really, really sorry I missed it, but I can barely keep track of what day is is thanks to my friggin sleep being ass-backwards, so I'm sorry I missed it. I'll make it up to you around Valentine's Day, promise. We'll talk on MSN, yeah? *ducks gunshot* YeswellIcanseeyou'reconsideringmyappologybyebye! *runs out* *falls down stairs* Karma doesn't like me!

Obviously I'm not on deviantART much these days. And really, you can't be if your computer is a dusty old fart with only 200MB of RAM. Still it really shouldn't be an excuse for my consistant inactivity.

On the contrary, I hope to possibly rectify that problem. But it wont be easy, that's for sure. In the past few years I've been rather burned out. There isn't too much of a reason for me to keep coming back to dA. My inactivity stems from my only having a couple active watchers, and in turn, many of those watchers probably stopped following me due to my inactivity. But I digress.

For as much as I claim to be a writer, in reality I'm much more of an entertainer, I just simply used my imagination and my writing skills to spin a good yarn. I've done so since around Fourth Grade. Pretty much the entirety of the enjoyment I get or have gotten from writing stems from having readers. I love experiencing the reader's reactions, listening to their likes and dislikes of the work. To me it gives purpose to my work.

Lately, however, I've been consumed by my love of playing video games. The inactivity on dA only further cemented this, and I find it harder and harder to find motivation to write anything, even when I'm full of inspiration.

But even now, when I'm trying my hardest to get back on the horse, I find more and more problems. First, I'm not afraid to admit that I'm lazy, or a procrastinator. And being a writer, these traits don't exactly help me put words down. Second, I've been expanding, growing as a person, and trying to improve my skills. When researching, taking notes, learning and such I realised that most of my ideas are heavily inspired by other works. Most of my work isn't entirely original, which concerns me as I have a very active imagination. Just as well, in my head I see visions of epic battles, heart-touching plot devices, but when I get them down in a document, they come out cheesy, cliché, and unimaginitive. These realizations obviously make a come back more difficult.

I went through a lot of my old material, and I all could say was "I wrote this uninspired rubbish?" I was an idiot then, and even now little seems to have changed. Outside of dA I've been working carefully to repair my writings, my characters. Working my ass off to make them original, non-cliché, give them depth, make it all believable. It's harder than it looks, and I've only gone so far in a couple years.

If I ever am to get back on the horse, I'll need to work diligently, but annoyingly I prefer to work at my own pace. It will take some time for me to fully rekindle my enjoyment for my old and forgotten hobby, and longer still to turn it into a shelf-worthy novel. Still I'll keep trying. I'm starting by trying to be more active on dA, so this is obviously an early step to that plan, and just as well I've updated my profile for the first time in about three years. I'm also going to try and revive the Oficial DAH! Fanclub. It'll give me another reason to be more active. I may even start a new group, though I'm not really sure what or why, heh.

Life isn't making it easier either, though it rarely does. While my panic disorder seems to be fairly under control, I still have the slight issue with acid reflux. My IBS is still in full effect, unfortunately, and in addition to those issues I now have a Thyroid deficiency, and I recently caught the flu, so I'm trying to fight that off. It isn't easy but I'll live. After all I've survived school, heartbreak, graduation, the death of a parent, and the highly controversial election of a non-white president. I think I'll manage, hah.

And so with that, I'll take my leave. The flu has messed up my sleep patterns, and with it being about 8 am, I should probably go to bed. Wish me luck friends.

In all honesty I'm not sure I'm ready to return. Hell, I'm not even sure I can stay commited to myself, let alone this, but we'll see. For now though, I've begun reconstructing the foundations of my legacy as a writer. Perhaps this time, it wont crumble from abandonment.